• In this section, I will be explaining both my characters’ personalities and providing images of what they look like. I have three major characters to focus on, complete with a breakdown of several elements that contribute to who they are. I’m focusing on my protagonist Dolores, my deuteragonist Mariko, and a major supporting character Wynn due to their prevalence in the story. Overall, my goal in “Infatuation” was to make complex characters that are both sympathetic and capable of making bad choices, regardless of whether or not we are meant to root for them or against them.
  • Dolores Zima
    • The Main Character
      • Dolores is an unreliable narrator and the protagonist, meaning that her perception of others is often warped, either based on knowledge she lacks at the time in the story, or due to her own biases.
        • Example: Dolores views Wynn as a threat to her relationship with Mariko even though Wynn has no interest in Mariko and has nothing Dolores should be jealous of other than hope.
    • Queer Womanhood
      • Dolores is a lesbian woman in the early 2000s and out, which requires a lot of courage and self-acceptance. However, it’s also clear she can be judgmental of people who don’t accept themselves, as she struggles to understand how people’s backgrounds and lack of support systems can impede their journey to self-acceptance.
    • Grief & Obsession
      • Dolores is shown to be an obsessive person, especially in romantic relationships. She often believes that she is not supported, when she is self-isolating due to a misbelief that she is fundamentally misunderstood. She thinks she has to be the number one priority in her significant other’s life, partially due to her parents’ incredibly passionate and loyal marriage, and partially because she gets incredibly emotionally invested in other people. This often sabotages her, especially with Mariko.
      • Dolores suffers from Prolonged Grief Disorder,  caused by the traumatic and sudden loss of Mariko, who she loved and was obsessive about. This ultimately causes worry in others and forces her to find herself outside of romance.
    • Isolation & Loneliness
      • Due to a combination of her queerness in the 90s and 2000s, Hunter society’s promotion of self-isolation and self-martyrdom, as well as Dolores’ obsessive qualities, Dolores feels incredibly lonely and cut off from everyone else. She feels distant from normal society, even her own family, and as a result keeps others at a distance, only furthering this cycle.
    • Avoidance
      • Dolores is an incredibly upfront person in her career and most friendships, but she struggles with emotional vulnerability. She often avoids dealing with confrontation until she’s explosive, or dances around her own feelings.
      • Dolores practices many unhealthy coping mechanisms for stress. She’s a workaholic due to both obsessive tendencies and her grief, but she also launches into risky relationships to avoid dealing with her own insecurities, fights recklessly as a Hunter, and uses humor as a coping mechanism beyond what is healthy.

[From left to right: Kathryn Merteuil from “Cruel Intentions” (1999) as a reference for Dolores’ dramatic outfit she wears to her final Council meeting and Mariko’s funeral. @book0bsessed on Tiktok who has a similar hairstyle, eye color, and facial features to what I picture for Dolores. Image from People.com of Hillary Duff in an early 2000s outfit that I picture Dolores wearing in her personal time.]

 [Commission of original art by Aria Yuengling (my roommate) of Dolores Zima (left) and Mariko Sasaki (right).]

  • Mariko Sasaki
    • Haunting The Narrative
      • Mariko, in all works currently conceived in the universe of “Infatuation” (I call it “The Angel Killers Universe”), never gets a chance to tell her own story, always warped and somewhat dishonest in her portrayals
      • Is notably dead in the 2013 time, and has been for years
    • Queer Denial
      • Is in heavy denial of the fact that she is attracted to women due to past trauma involving her stepmother’s emotional affair, expectations of those around her and the time, and her poor relationship history
      • Is not hostile towards queer people, a strong “ally” in fact, but cannot admit to herself that she is not straight
      • Unclear if she is bisexual (or any identities under the umbrella term) or a lesbian, as many of her relationships with men feel like self-sabotage, but it is honestly unclear. The idea of bisexuality was still very new to the general public at this time due to years of homophobia.
    • Paranoia & Self-Martyrdom
      • Mariko suffers from Paranoid Personality Disorder, a mental health disorder that pops up in late teens and early adulthood where the individual struggles with generally unfounded beliefs that people are out to get them or harm them in some capacity. There appears to be some correlation between childhood neglect and neglect and the development of PDD in adolescence and early adulthood. This applies to Mariko in terms of the emotional neglect of her stepmother, and to an extent, her father.
      • Mariko also struggles with self-martyrdom in relation to her somewhat unfounded belief in others trying to harm her, as she will often victimize herself or “sacrifice” herself for the sake of hiding this weakness
    • Generational Trauma & Motherhood
      • Has generational trauma of being a Hunter, but also of Megumi’s failures to kill the Children of Desdemona, and the subsequent “curse” that impacted them
      • When Mariko becomes a mother, she has a very hard time reconciling with the fact that she sacrificed her child for the greater good, especially since the minute she gave birth, she realized her baby didn’t deserve to be a living weapon  and brought up in an unstable, dangerous lifestyle. She ultimately tries to undo her mistake but to no avail. What’s done is done, and all she can do now is “damage control.”
    • Self-Destruction
      • Mariko has lots of self-destructive tendencies, partially due to trauma and paranoia, and partially due to the teachings of Hunter society. 
      • Self-sabotage in romantic relationships with healthy partners; picking partners who will give her a reason to be unhappy or resentful
      • Isolating herself to “protect” herself — only causes her to become more paranoid and lonely
      • Poor self-care habits and workaholism

[Image of tattoo design I found on Pinterest for Mariko’s tattoo (top). Image of Xu Xialing from “Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings” (2021) as hair and makeup reference for Mariko (bottom left). Image of Johanna Constantine from “The Sandman” (2022) as a reference for Mariko’s sleek fashion sense and her winter coat (right).]

  • Lesley Wynn Kowalski
    • Young but Wise
      • Wynn had to grow up too fast due to the tragic loss of their father and their mother’s abuse. This results in them often interacting with spaces meant for older adults at a younger age.
      • Wynn has also lost their best friend (and girlfriend, emotionally) due to the dangerous world of Hunting, and carries a desire to make sure that doesn’t happen to anyone else, which they try to enforce through the Council and their job as an Informer, but also by helping Mariko and trying to protect her daughter.
    • Queer Self-Acceptance
      • Much like Dolores, Wynn is a lesbian, but Wynn is also non-binary. It’s unclear if there are any subcategories they use, or what their birth gender was, as it does not matter: they are a person and therefore just as important as everyone else in the Council.
      • This self-acceptance contrasts Mariko and mirrors Dolores. However, unlike Dolores, Wynn has experienced a lack of support and can understand Mariko better.
      • Notably, Wynn’s need to always prove themself mimics the experience of womanhood, while the expectation for them to be stoic mimics the experience of manhood.
    • Idealism & Persistence
      • Wynn is an idealist, clinging onto hope that Hunter society can reform. This persistence of hope is because they have had to give themself hope their entire life, and they’ve witnessed change in themself and in the girl they love(d): Jessica.
    • Childhood Trauma & Making Change
      • Wynn witnessed their father’s death and was blamed for it because, although they were a child, they were also a Hunter. This was the excuse Wynn’s mother, a Councilmember and self-righteous Hunter, used to mistreat them instead of dealing with her grief and depression in a healthy way. This led to Wynn having a deep desire to protect youth from Hunter society and hold Hunters accountable.
      • Wynn’s mother was extremely anti-Hybrid, wanting to wipe out an entire mutation regardless of the impacts. This, combined with the fact that they always felt like a monster, led to Wynn’s pro-Hybrid sentiments.
      • Wynn witnessed their best friend die and spiralled into grief, which resulted in them losing their romantic relationship with Jessica. This added to their wisdom about taking accountability for yourself, but also to their workaholism and burn-out tendencies.
    • Workaholism
      • Wynn is a workaholic due to their intense need to “fix the world” when it’s a group effort, as they were always expected to be entirely self-sufficient. They tend to isolate themself like Dolores and Mariko, but are much better about interacting with the normal world, as a reminder of who the Council is meant to protect.

[Image of Winona Ryder’s character from “Reality Bites” (1994) as a reference for Wynn’s hair (though Wynn’s is somewhat lighter)]

[Image of Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester from “Supernatural” (close-up) as a reference for both Wynn’s freckles and eyes.]

[Image of Dr Kai Bartley (right) from “Grey’s Anatomy” (2021-2023) as a reference for Wynn’s stature and pronounced facial features (minus Wynn’s freckles).]

[Image of Clara Oswald from her final appearance in “Doctor Who” as a reference for Wynn’s professional, unassuming clothing style that reflects their youth and desire to be presentable.]